Nov 17, 2009 |
by Annette Bridges. ©2009. All rights reserved.
Even though my bank account is the smallest it’s been in a few years, I’ve never been as excited for Black Friday as I am this year.
It was actually only about five years ago when my daughter and I began our Black Friday tradition. Up until that time, I used to avoid the biggest shopping day of the year. But after having so much fun on our first Black Friday outing, we vowed to do it each year.
Maybe it depends on where you choose to shop on that day that makes the difference. I know the shopping mall where we go on the Friday following Thanksgiving is filled with festive decorations, Christmas music, happy faces and good will among holiday shoppers. The aura and atmosphere of the day is so enticing and captivating, I now never want to miss it!
Of course, the joy we experience could also have something to do with our own attitude and approach to the day.
Black Friday is the only shopping day of the year when we’re not on a tight schedule — other than getting to the mall before it opens. There is no other place we need to be that day, so we’re in no hurry. There is no rushing around or frantic searching. We take our time as we shop for the loved ones on our list.
Although we may have less money to spend this year, our spirits are not dampened and our anticipation is not lessened. In fact, we’ve been having fun trying to imagine and determine what we can buy with our smaller budget.
We’ve all probably heard the expression, “It’s not the gift, but the thought that counts.” Giving a gift need not be a stressful or expensive gesture. Regardless of my budget, I’ve found it helpful to let my heart and not my pocketbook guide my search for the perfect gift. In other words, a little creativity and thought-filled consideration of the people on your list can lead you to find the most meaningful (and affordable) gifts.
I read an interesting fictional article recently about gift giving. It described a woman who had sacrificed and saved all year as she planned for the Christmas gifts she wanted to give to her loved ones. Then it told of her sadness when some of them told her they couldn’t afford to give gifts that year. It wasn’t that she was sad to not get gifts from them, but they were trying to discourage her own giving, not knowing she had already bought and wrapped their gifts. The article also pointed out that these particular loved ones had spent so much money on themselves all year long that they didn’t have any extra money left for buying gifts for others.
Fortunately, this woman recovered from her sadness and didn’t let anyone take away her joy of self-sacrifice that enabled her to give gifts.
I loved being reminded of the joy of self-sacrifice. I recalled reading an article by the founder of my college several years ago that addressed this topic. This article illustrated how often an unselfish parent raises the most selfish children. It explained how selfishness can be a result of parents robbing their children from learning the joy that comes from genuine self-sacrifice — giving up for the sake of another, putting another’s needs or interests before their own. But isn’t this type of giving an example of true love — a reflection of the Christ spirit that the life of Jesus exemplified?
The holiday season always brings to mind one of the first Scriptures I learned as a child: “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
Somehow this verse is speaking to me in a fresh way as I prepare for my Black Friday shopping!
Imagine a day filled with pondering how much we love the people on our Christmas list. Imagine the desire to give whatever we can to them — and whatever we can give is enough. But still — we give.
I’m not putting a price tag on giving, my friends. My most memorable gifts are not the kind bought in a store — such as the gift that is homemade and the gift of someone’s time and attention.
But may all of our gifts show how much we love — whether it’s the gifts we buy on Black Friday or the gifts we give all year long.
Nov 17, 2009 |
by Annette Bridges. ©2009. All rights reserved.
Are you struggling with depression, loneliness or fear and wondering where God is? You’re not alone, my friend. Even David asked in one of his psalms, “How long wilt thou forget me, O Lord?” (Psalms 13:1)
It’s on dark and weary days that we desperately want to feel God’s healing presence more than ever.
Growing up with my mother taught me many lessons. I saw her overcome being homeless and jobless while having little means, education or so-called working skills to do so. I saw her conquer fear and uncertainty as she moved across country with her daughter following a difficult divorce. I saw her work her way out of poverty one day at a time — without government help I might add. One precious lesson can be summed up by the following Scripture — often quoted by my sweet mother: “Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you.” (James 4:8)
Of course — actually — God is always close by as the Psalmist concluded. “I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence! If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there. If I ride the wings of the morning, if I dwell by the farthest oceans, even there your hand will guide me and your strength will support me.” (Psalm 139:7-11)
God is forever near — holding us, leading us and lighting our path away from dark troubled roads. So since we can’t really be out of God’s presence, I think it’s more about us needing to direct our thoughts God-ward that helps us feel and experience His presence.
I was reminded of this recently as I listened to a song by one of my dearest friends. She and a friend produced a beautiful CD titled, “Inhabiting Eternity.” (cdbaby.com) I’ve listened to their CD on numerous occasions, and every time a certain song begins, I have to stop whatever I am doing and get very still so I can be fully embraced by its message.
The song is titled, “I will come before the Lord.” Its lyrics describe God as “my song.” It reminds us, much like the Psalmist did, that whether in the stillness of morning, brightness of day, hush of the evening or darkness of midnight, God is our song — forever near giving inspiration, strength, hope, guidance, peace.
This is comforting news. So whether I am looking for solutions, clarity, calm, or freedom from stress, sorrow or pain, I know there is a powerful divine presence that can meet any need. And this gentle presence is so palpable that when I divert my thoughts to the divine whole-heartedly, I feel the angels of His presence assuring me all will be well — that all is well.
It’s sometimes far too easy when overwhelmed by problems and worries to give up or give in to whatever doom is on the horizon. But I’m learning not to do it!
When I don’t know which way to turn or what to do, my first step these days is again to get very still in order to tune in to God.
Whether we have hours or only a few moments, we can be filled with the nearness of His presence, power and love. We can feel the might and majesty of His goodness. And we will experience the power of His presence giving us the spiritual light we need.
You are never alone or forgotten, my friend. Turn your mind toward God and you’ll find He’s right there by your side lifting you up so you can find the answers you need. May you feel God’s love and presence in every moment during the upcoming holiday season and the New Year ahead!
Nov 17, 2009 |
by Annette Bridges. ©2009. All rights reserved.
Perhaps you’re among the three million people who watched the YouTube video of the piano stairs. Volkswagen has initiated the fun theory which asserts that fun is the easiest way to change people’s behavior for the better. And there’s a contest currently underway exploring such questions as “Can fun make more people exercise?” or “Is entertainment the solution to litter?” (www.thefuntheory.com)
I wasn’t surprised that turning stairs into a life-size piano resulted in more people taking the stairs rather than the escalator. I would definitely choose the musical option as the fun way to go.
What’ your idea of fun?
This is the question I recently asked several friends and family members. Everyone defined fun a bit differently. However, the idea of fun people most often noted is time spent with family, friends or a spouse.
There were two overwhelming commonalities for having fun — being outdoors and being outdoors doing some physical activity. So maybe fun is already making people exercise more. Folks noted “fun” as taking a walk, watching a sunset, water skiing, horseback riding, watching or playing baseball or ice hockey, attending a football game, swimming, gardening, going for a long run, sitting on the creek bank fishing, climbing a mountain, having a picnic when it’s sweater weather, and sitting out on the patio late at night with the tiki torches lit and a fire in the chiminea. The latter sounds like my kind of fun!
There were other fun ideas that didn’t necessarily require being outdoors, but they did require getting out of the house. This kind of fun was described as going out to dinner, shopping for shoes, attending live music concerts, visiting cool architectural spaces, exploring art exhibits and going country western dancing. I think my first vote of a fun pastime would be shopping for shoes, with going out to dinner a close second!
But apparently many people also have fun inside the comfort of their homes and sometimes even when they are alone. Folks mentioned such merriments as cooking, taking a Sunday afternoon nap, reading a good book, dancing when no one else is watching, playing with kittens and puppies, surfing the web, exploring spiritual truths to their depth as well as cooking and doing artwork with grandchildren. These all sound good to me, but I don’t have grandchildren yet. I certainly always loved cooking and doing artwork with my daughter throughout her growing up years.
One friend mentioned the excitement she feels every time she sees the beach. The exhilaration and jubilation is mutual, my friend!
Another mentioned traveling and cruising with friends as her idea of enjoyment. Sounds fun to me!
I was captured by the idea one friend shared: “Doing new things but not quite the “jump off the cliff in my wing suit” level.” Did you see that YouTube video? I’m quite sure I’m not ready to take flight in a wing suit, but I do love the idea of doing new things and traveling to new places as a preferred choice of recreation and amusement. Or as another friend said it, “Doing something unusual that’s not part of my daily routine — letting go of inhibitions.”
A couple of friends shared some ideas of fun which may best describe my current longing. One said, “Laughing so hard that tears roll down my cheeks.” And yet another friend summed up fun as “Anything that gets me to stop thinking and just ‘be’ — shopping, singing, dancing, laughing, or any combination of those.”
Sometimes I think too much about everything that’s going on in my life or a family member’s life or what’s on the news. And I want to stop thinking and just have fun the way I do when I’m at Disneyworld!
But one very wise friend reminded me that there is always joy to be found in everything. And she’s right. Thanks for the reminder. A change in my point of view has often changed my outlook from drudgery to joy.
The idea of having fun may sometimes seem far away, unreachable or unattainable. But I think this could be due to a limited view of what having fun means or under what conditions that fun is supposed to happen. Perhaps we need to broaden and expand our definition. My friends and family members have certainly given me more possibilities of fun to consider. And hopefully, you’ll find their list helpful as well.
And finally in the words of yet another thoughtful friend — “May we all find a little fun whenever we need it.” Or maybe — we could make our own fun by imagining our favorite song playing while we dance up the stairs.
Nov 17, 2009 |
by Annette Bridges. ©2009. All rights reserved.
After watching the movie, Julie and Julia, I was inspired to clean my very dusty cookbook shelves and fix something I’d never cooked before.
It was amazing to discover how many awesome cookbooks I own — many that I have never opened. Some I purchased through the many years of my marriage, and others were gifts. I found the first cookbook I bought almost thirty years ago when I started dating my husband.
This reminds me of the first time I prepared dinner for him. I had never cooked before other than grilling a hamburger. My biggest mistake was not purchasing my cookbook before I cooked.
We were having baked chicken. This seemed easy enough to accomplish without instructions. My mom had never told me, however, that I needed to remove the neck and whatever else was on the inside of the bird. And no one had ever told me which side was up. I baked my chicken — breast side down.
Our side dish was mashed potatoes. This, too, seemed easy enough for a novice like me. My boyfriend graciously ate his dinner and asked a few questions after complimenting his food. He was very interested in how I made the potatoes. I told him I simply peeled, cut and boiled the potatoes and then mashed them with my new electric mixer. He suggested that maybe next time, I should try draining the water from the potatoes and adding milk and butter before mixing. After taking a bite of my first mashed potatoes and setting them aside as inedible, I agreed that something more was needed.
I bought a cookbook before I cooked again.
Some of my fondest memories have been of cooking. As with the rest of my life, I’ve had firsts, successes, flops and mistakes. But regardless, all of the dishes became an important part of a cherished memory. Diligence, patience and perseverance were found to be key ingredients for success in cooking as in most other areas of life.
When I first started cooking, everything was new. Cooking was a fun adventure as I learned to do something I’d never done before. But it didn’t take long before I was repeating my tried and trusty recipes again and again, and cooking something new became less and less frequent.
Cooking is not the only area of my life that has become stagnant, boring or not working as efficiently and creatively as it once did. And I suspect I am not alone.
Many people are being faced with rewriting their lives. Some are in search of a new career at a time when they should be looking forward to their retirement benefits. Some are waiting for their stock values to go from stagnant to gain. We all have times in our lives when our daily routines or relationships need a good overhaul.
Maybe we already have everything we need at our disposal and we only need a new perspective or a fresh idea on how to use what we have.
Julia Child said, “I was 32 when I started cooking. Up until then, I just ate.”
I think that describes me. Up until now, I’ve just been eating — and eating the same things day after day. But I’ve also just been living — sometimes only going through the motions, no longer curious, no longer excited, no longer with high anticipation. So now over 50, I’m ready to cook up something new and not just in my kitchen.
I already have over 50 old cookbooks sitting on my shelves filled with new recipes to be tried. And I’ve already redecorated my house by taking everything off my walls and re-hanging in new locations. Now I plan to revamp my daily exercise program, redefine what I do for fun as well as explore untried avenues for making money.
Often the answers we seek are not “out there” somewhere but rather within our reach. Do you need to cook up something new for your life? I think you’ll be surprised to learn you have what you need, my friends.
Julia Child once said, “This is my invariable advice to people: Learn how to cook — try new recipes, learn from your mistakes, be fearless, and above all have fun!” Sounds like good advice for outside of the kitchen, too.
Nov 17, 2009 |
by Annette Bridges. ©2009. All rights reserved.
The tradition of Halloween has both European and Celtic roots. It seems the ancient custom held that ghosts came back to the earthly world on a certain day. In an attempt to protect themselves from these ghosts, people wore masks when they left their homes after dark so that the ghosts would mistake them for fellow spirits. Additionally, to keep ghosts away from their houses, people placed bowls of food outside their homes to appease the ghosts and prevent them from attempting to enter.
It’s said that the Halloween tradition came to the United States in 1840 with the arrival of a group of Irish immigrants. And trick-or-treating — as we know it — developed between 1920 and 1950 as a relatively inexpensive way for an entire community to share the Halloween celebration. Today, Americans spend an estimated $6.9 billion annually on Halloween, making it the country’s second biggest commercial holiday.
Of course, the spirit of Halloween and the meaning behind it has changed over the centuries, yet it is still a holiday that allows us to pretend to be someone else.
Costume parties and masquerade balls have no age barrier. Both the young and the old love to dress in disguise and behind masks. Even if only for a night, we enjoy becoming the image of our hero or the star of our worst nightmare or our favorite fantasy.
Our selection of costume doesn’t really matter. What is interesting is how our behavior changes to match the identity or character of our impersonation. For many of us, it seems easier to be someone other than our real selves. I admit that it has sometimes been more difficult to be my real self than to create a façade for a Halloween party.
What face do you put on every morning? Do your friends and co-workers know the real you? Or do they only see who you want them to see?
When I’m in a group setting, I’ve often found it difficult to be myself. My natural personality becomes hidden by what I may feel others will expect of me or by what I think they will accept. Sometimes I feel intimidated in a large group. And feelings of inadequacy, fear and shyness cause me to camouflage my true inclinations.
How can we dispose of our masks and let our real self be seen and known?
Perhaps before we can be who we are, we need to know who we are. I love the title of a book I once saw on bookstore shelves: “Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.”
We each have an authentic self that God created — and it’s one of a kind, individual and special. Don’t be afraid to let others see the “real” you. You don’t need to spend a lifetime trying to be more like your mom or your brother or a teacher. Your life journey is about knowing and being “you.” And you are someone who is worthy to know. Knowing yourself begins with a sincere desire to do so. And since God made you, you can be confident you’ll like what you learn. God does!
So don’t let anything deprive your world from knowing you — the real you. Be willing to learn about the child that God created. And be willing to explore and discover your talents and abilities. You and I have a unique purpose to be fulfilled.
Have fun this Halloween and choose your favorite mask to wear. But after Halloween, my friends, remove your mask. Don’t put on another face other than your own each day. Everyone around you will be happy to meet YOU!
