Oct 27, 2007 |
by Annette Bridges. © 2007. All rights reserved.
It’s seven days till Thanksgiving, and I’m not home cleaning house. Nor have I done my grocery shopping for our Thanksgiving feast. Actually, I’ve not even made my shopping list yet! What am I doing? I’m camping with my husband in a very remote location.
Solitude during the holiday season is a gift to be relished, I’ve heard. My daughter told me to enjoy the quietness and relaxation before all the hustle and bustle gets in full swing. But I did bring along some holiday catalogs and cookbooks to peruse. And, clearly, I brought my laptop, since I’m typing this column as I sit at our camper dining table enjoying the view — hills, trees, sky and our puppy basking in the sun on the camper window shelf. The only sounds I can hear are birds singing, and I think I hear some cows off in the distance.
As I sit here reflecting on the holidays ahead, I’m wondering why the season of peace, love and goodwill is also a season notorious for raising people’s stress levels. The demands on our time are steadily increasing — from work to parties, decorating, shopping, baking, cleaning and scores of other chores and responsibilities. Yes, there certainly are many things I want to do and little time to do them.
Perhaps we get caught up in trying to create the perfect Hallmark holiday. Or perhaps we attempt to re-create the Currier and Ives Christmas of our childhood. Whatever our motivation, we may feel the pressure of the fast-approaching holiday deadline and become consumed with fear and anxiety that we will not accomplish the memory we long for.
Our anxiety is a good indicator that we need to bring a healthy and holy balance to our goals and aspirations. This reminds me of Jesus’ visit with Martha and Mary. Jesus and his disciples were on a journey to Jerusalem and went to Martha and Mary’s home in a nearby village. Apparently, while Martha was distracted by the big dinner she was preparing, her sister Mary was listening to Jesus as he taught.
Eventually, Martha approached Jesus and said, “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.”
But Jesus responded, “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! There is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:38-42, Eugene Peterson, The Message)
I can’t help but believe that Martha had good intentions and was working hard to give her best efforts for her special guest and friends.
But I can also see that perhaps her overzealous focus on “details,” as Jesus described her busyness, was keeping her from listening and pondering the good news Jesus had to share. He was giving a feast that would provide an everlasting meal of strength and healing and an endless supply of inspiration and hope — sounds to me like a feast not to be missed!
Mary was not faulted for being attentive to Jesus’ teachings. It was clear she was not worried about anything else. She knew what was most important in that moment and made the choice to listen and grow in spiritual knowledge.
In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus told his followers, ” … seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you” (Matthew 6:33). This seems like good instruction for setting our priorities and making our choices. If followed, we could surely walk through holiday clamor and would experience the most wonderful time of the year blessing others and being blessed ourselves, too.
Then we will not allow time constraints to dictate and dominate our thought to the point of forgetting the reason for the season. We will leave room for quiet reflection, prayer and study, as well as rejoicing and praise.
And we will not neglect opportunities to spend quality time with loved ones. We will outline less what and how our holidays should look and be more flexible and open for new and spontaneous ways to celebrate. We will count blessings rather than what is missing or what remains on our to-do list. And we will observe and honor each moment, giving our full attention to whoever is with us sharing each moment.
No doubt we can keep our cool this holiday season if we keep our priorities in better, holier order, which will certainly help us make good choices as well as make lasting, special memories.
Oct 27, 2007 |
by Annette Bridges. © 2007. All rights reserved.
“There is always, always, always something to be thankful for” the sign said. I chuckled reading the three “always.” And I thought, yes, sometimes I need extra encouragement to remember that.
Too often there have been times in my life when I’ve put off being thankful, saying to myself: I’ll be thankful when I get accepted to my college of choice, I’ll be thankful when I meet my husband, I’ll be thankful when we build a new house, or when I lose weight. I was fooled into believing that a certain culmination of events was required before thankfulness could be felt.
In each of these life lessons, my prayers have taught me how a moment of gratitude can provide a radical shift in perspective that reveals God’s activity and presence all around me. These lessons remind me of Mary Baker Eddy’s words, “Are we really grateful for the good already received? Then we shall avail ourselves of the blessings we have, and thus be fitted to receive more.”
In everything we did, in every moment we spent together, we were grateful.
Every year about this time, I recall the holiday season when I learned my first lesson in how thankfulness could transform my perspective, and consequently, my experience. I was a young child at the time, on the road with my mom after her divorce. We were homeless with little money as we traveled from town to town. Yet, losing most of what we had owned was not the end of our world. We had a daily practice of prayer and thankfulness that brought us joy and gave us a feeling of hope.
Although it was a difficult period, some of my fondest memories are from that holiday time. I think it became so special because of the gift of gratitude my mom and I gave each other. In everything we did, in every moment we spent together, we were grateful. We were grateful for present moments, and we were grateful for whatever tomorrow would bring. This included being thankful to have a Christmas tree—albeit the smallest tree I’d ever seen—for spending hours together making decorations, and cooking our favorite holiday sweets.
We were also thankful that my mom was able to find a job wherever we lived, even if it only lasted a few weeks or a few days. Counting, or considering our blessings, wasn’t something we did only at bedtime or when we were studying our Bible lesson. Gratitude helped us to see what was right and good in our lives wherever we were. It strengthened my understanding of God’s goodness, and inspired my mother with a new and promising view of our future.
When my heart is filled with gratitude I’m grounded in God’s presence.
One of my favorite hymns in the Christian Science Hymnal speaks of thankful living as having a grateful heart. In three verses a grateful heart is described as a garden, a fortress, and a temple. Throughout my life I’ve found this to be true. A grateful heart is a garden of comfort and peace that dispels anxiety and fear. It’s a fortress of certainty and hope that outlasts feelings of helplessness and vulnerability. And it’s a temple of strength and courage that brings expectancy of progress, growth, healing–even new beginnings.
Thankful living has enabled me again and again to experience the operation of God’s laws in the very moment that I’ve felt in need. “My cup runneth over” said the Psalmist. Isn’t this exactly what happens when we begin with gratitude? The good that has always been present comes into focus.
I’ve noticed that when my heart is filled with gratitude I’m grounded in God’s presence. I’m filled with proof of God’s love. Living life from this vantage point leads to a bounty of infinite possibility and progress, today and tomorrow. Now that’s a promise to be thankful for.
Oct 24, 2006 |
by Annette Bridges. © 2006. All rights reserved.
Homecoming celebrations. Platefuls of turkey and dressing, cranberry sauce and pecan pie. Perhaps a feast less about food and more about family.
Americans gather with their loved ones and give thanks for the many blessings in their lives. Even when material treasures appear sparse, Americans remember the intangibles held close to heart, and are grateful to be together.
Days of thanksgiving began long before a national proclamation was made. For the Plymouth colonists, it was a celebration of food and feasting following their first harvest. During the 1700s, it was common practice for individual colonies to observe a day of thanksgiving throughout the year, but it was a day set aside for prayer and fasting rather than feasting.
Later in the 19th century, states designated a day of thanksgiving in honor of a military victory, the adoption of a state constitution or a bountiful crop. It was in 1863 that President Abraham Lincoln issued a proclamation calling for the observance of a national Thanksgiving holiday. And it was in 1941 when President Franklin D. Roosevelt made the national holiday the fourth Thursday in November.
Yet every Thanksgiving, thousands of families celebrate without a father, mother, son, daughter, brother or sister. This year is no exception, with thousands of American troops deployed overseas during the holidays. Last year was different for my family, because we were among those thousands.
Our daughter married a little over three years ago, only six days before our son-in-law was to begin his Air Force training. Training completed, he left the country last fall on his first deployment. And our daughter, with her puppy in tow, returned to mom and dad’s house.
Difficult times, yes. But we kept our soldier ever in our thoughts, conversation and prayers.
Although he was not present at our Thanksgiving dinner table, his empty place was set. We didn’t raise our forks until we first expressed our gratitude for his service to our nation. We honored his willingness to put the safety and security of his fellow citizens before his own. We paid tribute to his ideals, dedication, passion, patriotism, courage and conviction. And we prayed for and praised all servicemen and women and their families.
These words by Mary Baker Eddy summarized our daily prayer: “[M]ay their love of country and their faithful service thereof, be unto them life-preservers!”
I must admit, holiday seasons have come and gone year after year without me giving more than a passing thought to the sacrifices made by our military and their families. Last year I vowed to begin a new tradition — to have an empty place set at our dinner table every Thanksgiving. To never forget again the thousands who are separated from loved ones during precious holiday gatherings.
Perhaps you would like to join us? Set a place at your Thanksgiving dinner table, too. And from table to table, we’ll give thanks all across America for our selfless heroes. And pray for their safe return home.
My family had a second Thanksgiving feast when our soldier came home in January. A day for thanksgiving, indeed!
Oct 24, 2006 |
by Annette Bridges. © 2006. All rights reserved.
The season of Thanksgiving is upon us. For the Hallmark card company this means sales.
Annually, sales of thank-you notes spike in December and January, undoubtedly fueled by the 58 percent of moms who, according to the Hallmark Research Department, actively teach their children to write notes of appreciation for gifts they’ve received from family and friends.
My mom taught me thanking others in some tangible way is good manners. Certainly we appreciate kindnesses shown to us. But is that all there is to gratitude — expressing thanks for how much good we have or being grateful when something good happens?
What about when things don’t go our way? When we’re having a bad day? When we’re going through difficult times? When we’re stressed, anxious or sad? Where is our gratitude then? Perhaps we’ve become too dependent on outward circumstances, allowing them to dictate how we feel, rather than the other way around.
Suppose gratitude is not merely a passing sentiment. Maybe gratitude is not so much about what happens to us, but more about how we happen to the world around us.
Consider gratitude as an attitude, a point of view and a state of being. With gratitude as the premise for every thought, feeling and action, how would your day change? Do you doubt that your mental state impacts everything and everyone around you?
One Christmas, my daughter gave me a magnet inscribed, “If Mamma Ain’t Happy, Ain’t Nobody Happy.” We laughed about it, but actually, that magnet expressed how she felt. I started realizing how my attitude affected my entire home. Certainly my attitude influenced my actions, my mood, my tone of voice. And consequently, my attitude impacted every member of the family, day by day, for better or worse.
I soon learned that my attitude didn’t influence only my family. You can test this for yourself. Walk into a store or workplace or a meeting. Think happy thoughts. Count your blessings. Hum your favorite song. Smile. Walk confidently with joy in each step. And watch the people around you. See how they respond.
Then try the reverse. This time think unhappy, miserable thoughts. Grumble to yourself. Slouch. Drag your feet. Frown. And watch those around you. I bet they run for cover and avoid even making eye contact with you!
I’ve found gratitude to be an unlimited and infinite resource. A wellspring that never runs dry. A resource that is available in any and every moment. How is this possible, you ask? Because a grateful heart is our divine nature, inherent in each of us as children of God — unconditional Love, infinite Good.
It’s no wonder that gratitude can transform even the most desperate of situations into one of hope, optimism, and certainty of a better and brighter day.
How can we live in a state of joyful expectation? A grateful heart begins with the moment. This moment. Make a conscious choice to be present in the moment. Get off automatic pilot. Think about what you’re doing, what’s happening around you. Ask yourself, do you feel gratitude right now in this moment? There is always something to appreciate, even in the worst of times.
I’ve started to begin each day with recognizing the good that is present. Waking up pondering my God-given grateful heart helps me see the good around me. Making gratitude a daily practice will change your life. It has mine.
What can gratitude do for you? Gratitude can quiet anxiety. Relieve stress. Soften anger. Make you feel lighter, happier.
Gratitude will lift you up. Build you up. Strengthen you. Nourish you. Sustain you. Comfort you.
Gratitude eases worry. Brings clarity of mind. Helps you forgive. Affirms that good is stronger than evil. Assures all is well, all will be well. With a grateful heart you can handle anything that comes your way.
Gratitude gives you a zest for living. Enables you to savor everything life puts before you. Helps you see your life as a gift instead of as overworked, mundane, or burdensome. You’ll find contentment. Satisfaction.
Gratitude makes you feel blessed. And impels you to bless others. So great is the healing power of gratitude.
Endless are the reasons for thanks-giving during this holiday season and in every moment of every day of the year.
Oct 13, 2006 |
by Annette Bridges. © 2005. All rights reserved.
Thursday, November 24, 2005. A national day of Thanksgiving.
Homecoming celebrations. Platefuls of turkey and dressing, cranberry sauce and pecan pie. Perhaps a feast less about food and more about family.
Americans gather with their loved ones and give thanks for the many blessings in their lives. Even when material treasures appear sparse, Americans remember the intangibles held close to heart and are grateful to be together.
Days of thanksgiving began long before a national proclamation was made. For the Plymouth colonists, it was a celebration of food and feasting following their first harvest.
During the 1700’s, it was common practice for individual colonies to observe days of thanksgiving throughout the year, but it was a day set aside for prayer and fasting rather than feasting.
Later in the 19th century, states would designate a day of thanksgiving in honor of a military victory, an adoption of a state constitution or a bountiful crop.
It was in 1863 when President Abraham Lincoln issued a proclamation calling for the observance of a national Thanksgiving holiday. And it was in 1941 when President Franklin D. Roosevelt made the national holiday the fourth Thursday in November.
Every Thanksgiving, thousands of families celebrate without a father, mother, son, daughter, brother or sister.
This year is no exception with thousands of American troops deployed overseas during the holidays. This year is different for my family because this year my family is among those thousands.
Our daughter married a little over two years ago, only six days before our son-in-law was to begin his Air Force training. Training completed, he left the country a couple of months ago on his first deployment. And our daughter, with her puppy in tow, returned to mom and dad’s house.
Difficult times, yes. But we keep our soldier ever in our thoughts, conversation and prayers.
Although he will not be present at our Thanksgiving dinner table, his empty place will be set. We will not raise our forks without first expressing our gratitude for his service to our nation. We will honor his willingness to put the safety and security of his fellow citizens before his own. We will pay tribute to his ideals, dedication, passion, patriotism, courage and conviction. And we will praise and pray for all servicemen and women and their families.
These words by Mary Baker Eddy, author of Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, have become part of our daily prayer: “…may their love of country and their faithful service thereof, be unto them life-preservers!”
I must admit, holiday seasons have come and gone year after year without me giving more than a passing thought to the sacrifices made by our military and their families. This year I vow to begin a new tradition. From now on, we will have an empty place set at our dinner table every Thanksgiving. To never forget again the thousands that are separated from loved ones during precious holiday gatherings.
Perhaps you would like to join us?
Set an empty place at your Thanksgiving dinner table, too. And from table to table, we’ll give thanks all across America for our selfless heroes. And pray for their safe return home.
My family will most certainly have reason to feast again when our soldier comes home. A day for thanks giving, indeed!
