Oct 17, 2006 |
by Annette Bridges. © 2006. All rights reserved.
The premise for this column began as a conversation with a friend who is a writer, Bible researcher and speaker to Bible-study groups. She also co-leads tours to the Holy Land, Greece, Egypt and Turkey. For years now I’ve been promising her that one of these days my husband and I were going to take a tour with her – and asking her to not give up on us. My most recent promise was made last week.
Her response back to me was a gentle reminder about seizing the moment — and a familiar Bible story. The story was about the blind fellow, Bartimaeus, when he was by the roadside outside Jericho. He realized that somewhere in the passing crowd, among pilgrims on their way to the Passover in Jerusalem, was Jesus of Nazareth. Desperately wanting to meet Jesus, he called out, was shushed by those around him, called out again … and was healed.
According to the Interpreter’s Bible, it was good that he was persistent and seized the moment, because, unbeknownst to him, and to almost everyone, this would be the last time Jesus would pass that way. This was Jesus’ last trip to Jerusalem, so Bartimaeus would not have another opportunity to have a one-on-one with him.
The Interpreter’s Bible tells us to be sure we seize the moment.
I immediately began thinking about many times in my life when I’ve not seized the moment. I’ve always had my reasons, of course. But now I’m trying to decide whether or not my reasons for missing some opportunities were good enough. And I’m asking myself, what is it that keeps me from seizing moments now?
Hoping to learn that I was not the ONLY person in the world who has this struggle, I decided to ask several friends what keeps them from seizing the moment.
“Fear” was high on the list of reasons for many folks — fear of what may happen, fear of failure, fear of change, fear of risk. Some said uncertainty about a decision — questioning if it’s the best thing to do — generally makes them afraid to act and so they don’t. One friend said: “Fear of what I think others are likely to think. Fear of disapproval by others has a paralyzing effect on my actions.” And still another said, “It’s when I evaluate things based on how I think others will think of me that I fail to seize the moment.”
Plain ol’ procrastination was the reason for some. Sometimes we put off seizing moments because of laziness. Or we hesitate to make a decision, so we put off thinking about it, only to realize later what should have been done or said. One friend said she likes to spend time in contemplation with God first thing in the morning, but some mornings she will think, “I’ll just do this one thing, and maybe just one more thing, and then I’ll get back to God.” But on mornings she does this, the day will be over, and she will not have even said good morning to Him.
Fretting over time rather than living in the eternal now keeps many from seizing the moment. In what I call the “Scarlett O’Hara” approach, we say, “Maybe tomorrow would be a better time,” but when tomorrow comes, it is too late. The moment, the opportunity, the possibility is gone with the wind.
Time excuses also can stem from stubbornness and rigidity or even indifference and inertia. As one friend put it: “My schedule is already too full, or there are already too many demands on my time. It’s easy to get so involved in the present moments that seem to cry for my attention, that I can fail to perceive a special opportunity to help someone.” Another said: “It didn’t seem that important at the time to follow through. It just didn’t register as anything special or offer any immediate interest.”
Sometimes it’s a matter of “my way” or “no way.” One friend said, “I had other plans at the time and didn’t want to change my plans.” I’m not saying changing our plans is always the thing to do in every situation, mind you, but still, perhaps it’s good to be flexible and spontaneous so that we leave some room for moments that could be seized.
How we view ourselves can greatly impact whether or not we seize moments. One friend said sometimes he looks more at his limitations and lets this view determine what he can do, think or appreciate. Such a view always makes us believe we don’t have the ability needed. Or we may just feel unworthy. Guilt often turns into an attitude of unworthiness.
Sometimes to seize or not to seize the moment becomes a battle of wills — human will or the divine. A friend said: “Maybe you know it’s right to do something, but you don’t let yourself. You let some reason sway you in a different direction.” She said she was reminded of the story of Jonah and the whale. “He tried to avoid seizing the moment and heeding God’s direction.”
But she did offer some good news and hope for those folks who are lamenting over moments they wish they had seized. She said, “If it’s a God-directed idea, I think the opportunity will arise again until it is acted upon.” Jonah did get a second opportunity to follow God’s direction.
Many people live their days so mired in the past or worried about the future that they remain unaware of the treasure of the present that they already possess. We can waste precious time worrying about some future moment. What often happens to me is that I worry about something that could happen. Then circumstances change, and whatever I was concerned about doesn’t even exist anymore. Priceless moments that could have been savored were lost. This reminds me of the song by Seals & Croft, “We may never pass this way again.” One verse encourages us to “Sail our ships out on the open seas, cast away our fears and all the years that come and go. … ” Yes, and enjoy each moment before it passes us by!
My husband and I have decided to not be so focused on making and saving money that we never take the time to enjoy life. And when we go on a vacation, we’re committed to being on vacation and not thinking about work waiting for us to do when we get home.
Savoring each moment of our lives brings joy and thankfulness for each life moment. I want to be willing to explore new territories, go places I’ve never been before. Life is fresh, exhilarating and full of limitless possibilities when we live fully and mindfully in the moment. Our comfort zone may be comfortable, but it also offers nothing new. As singer Lee Ann Womack sang, “And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.”
It’s easier to seize the moment when we live our lives as minutemen and minutewomen. During the American Revolutionary War, the minuteman was an armed man pledged to be ready to fight on a minute’s notice. But being a minuteman is not about being in a hurry. Perhaps Americans have become too consumed by a need to hurry, evidenced by such inventions as airplanes, television, computers, email, microwave ovens, cell phones, express checkout lanes and fast food.
Being a minuteman and minutewoman is not dancing too fast. As someone put it, “Life is not a race.” Slow down and enjoy the dance. God will reveal to us the “what and how.” We need only be willing, waiting, faithful and obedient to seize the moment. God will do the rest.
Oct 14, 2006 |
by Annette Bridges. © 2006. All rights reserved.
Do you feel like you’ve been abandoned and no one has your back? Do you feel alone, even when you’re in a room full of people? Loneliness can consume our body and soul and confuse and distort our perceptions. But “one” is not necessarily the loneliest number!
Everyone has times when they are alone, either by circumstances or choice. Actually, it’s essential to have times when we choose to be alone.
I cherish my moments of solitude. Sometimes my alone time is sipping a cup of hot tea while studying my Bible lesson or perusing a magazine, or taking a walk, or sitting in a comfy chair writing in my journal, or relaxing on the sofa reading a book. My alone time might even be just sitting quietly at my desk meditating, reflecting, praying.
Time alone in spiritual reflection can help bring balance and perspective to our lives. And such holy moments can refresh a troubled heart with reasons for hope and point toward solutions. These alone-with-God moments can be a wonderful gift to ourselves, moments that enable us to feel the embrace of our Father-Mother God and be reminded that we’re loved and wanted.
Sometimes people avoid being alone, hoping to escape from having to be alone with their thoughts, their fears or their insecurities. But being alone with God enables one to confront whatever would cause us to be troubled, afraid or insecure. God is an almighty power, conquering any evil and overcoming any disease of mind, body or spirit.
I’ve had times when I’ve struggled with being home alone, particularly when my husband goes out of town for a few days on a hunting trip. Even if I have friends or family staying with me, I still struggle with the feeling of loneliness. The only thing that helps me in these times is pondering the love that God has for us both and thinking of the love we share with each other as a natural expression of the love that God has instilled in each of us. This helps me feel united with my husband in God’s love, and I realize that no matter where I am or my husband is, I can still feel his love and he can feel mine. Love knows no boundaries and is not confined by time and space.
When we struggle with loneliness, we may feel that nobody else has ever been in our shoes, which, by the way, is never true. We may believe we’re not understood and that there is no one to turn to. We may fear being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people and then generally behave in such a way that forces our worst fears to become true. Some call this a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I can’t help but be reminded of Harry in the movie “Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.” Increasingly being faced with crisis situations, Harry insists his friends could never understand his turmoil and begins to push them away, lamenting that he must endure and face the enemy, Lord Voldemort, alone.
His emotional struggle with feelings of separation and isolation becomes possibly his most difficult battle and one that perhaps was part of his enemy’s battle plan against him. As Luna Lovegood wisely concludes and advises Harry, “Well, if I were You-Know-Who, I’d want you to feel cut off from everyone else. ‘Cause if it’s just you alone, you’re not as much of a threat.” Harry eventually discovered and learned the strength and power of having his friends at his side.
Each of us, as a child of God, has the companionship of our divine Parent and Friend forever at our side — ready, willing and able to help us in any situation. God is ever present, ever ready to be “our refuge and strength” and is truly “a very present help in trouble” (Psalm 46:1).
We need not feel we must tackle life’s challenges by ourselves. Divine help is at hand.
Loneliness is nothing but a state of thought. And thought can be changed, uplifted, inspired and encouraged. Whether we’re struggling with feelings of abandonment, rejection, depression, insecurity, anxiety, hopelessness or unworthiness, a spiritual outlook can lift our mental state above our limited human perception. A good dose of “heavenly inspiration” is the only cure I’ve found for overcoming feelings of loneliness. And I get my best inspiration when I’m alone with God.
Still think you’re alone? Well, you’re not! ” … the God of love and peace shall be with you” always! (2 Corinthians 13:11)
Oct 13, 2006 |
by Annette Bridges. © 2006. All rights reserved.
What’s the greatest Christmas gift in the world? Perfect for any age or gender?
It was over twelve years ago when my mom and daughter joined me on a three week journey. We crossed the country traveling through much of the northeast. Three generations of women sharing treasured moments together. It was awesome and unforgettable.
So much so we made a vow to do it again. But we haven’t kept that promise. That is, until a couple of weeks ago. The three of us once again went on a memorable journey together.
And that brings me back to the greatest Christmas gift. How many times have I never done what I said I was going to do?
And why not?
There has always been a reason. Or so I would convince myself. The most frequently given excuse has been – not enough time.
Sometimes I wonder how much time I have wasted worrying about not having enough time. And consequently getting nothing done because I’m too busy fretting about not having enough time to accomplish what I want or need to do.
Recently, I came across an article written by spirituality and health reformer, Mary Baker Eddy (See www.marybakereddy.org), which was published in 1903. Titled “Now and Then”, its timeless ideas are now transforming my every decision and action.
Ideas such as ….
”A lost opportunity is the greatest of losses.”
“We own no past, no future, we possess only now.”
“If the reliable now is carelessly lost in speaking or in acting, it comes not back again.”
“Faith in divine Love supplies the ever-present help and now, and gives the power to act in the living present.”
So what’s the greatest Christmas gift in the world?
I think it’s – today.
Perhaps that really is why it’s called – the present.
I’m going to try and give as many “todays” as I can this year. Look for present possibilities to make memorable moments with friends and loved ones. I think it may be the greatest gift I can give. And maybe the most memorable.
Oct 13, 2006 |
by Annette Bridges. ©2006. All rights reserved.
Sometimes I think about how much time I’ve wasted worrying about not having enough time. It’s a vicious circle. I get nothing done because I’m too busy fretting about not having enough time to accomplish what I want to do.
So I stress over impossible deadlines on a project I’m working on. I worry that a remodeling project won’t get completed before Christmas. I feel overwhelmed with so many responsibilities that I don’t go visit my mom or my brother or call a friend. And the list could go on.
Recently I got some new insights into how to win the battle with time—or lack of it—from “Now and Then,” an article written by Mary Baker Eddy that was published in 1903 (The First Church of Christ, Scientist, and Miscellany, pp. 12-14).
Here are a few ideas that inspired me:
“We own no past, no future, we possess only now.”
“If the reliable now is carelessly lost in speaking or in acting, it comes not back again.”
“Faith in divine Love supplies the ever-present help and now, and gives the power to ‘act in the living present.’”
“Now is the accepted time.”
The Apostle Paul also spoke of “now” in regard to time. He said, “Behold, now is the accepted time….” One definition for “accepted” is “preferred.” So now, not later, is the preferred time.
I think focusing on now, from a spiritual standpoint of our relation to God, can show me how to win the time-crunch war.
My step dad, who introduced me and my mom to Christian Science, began every day thinking about these words by Mary Baker Eddy: “To those leaning on the sustaining infinite, to-day is big with blessings.” Those words were part of his morning prayer, which he often shared aloud as he drove me to school.
The solution to enjoying blessings in the now surely is found in God, the sustaining infinite. Divine Love, or God, is here with us right now to help us with our every need. Love helps us shape our right desires into present actions.
We don’t need more time—just right now.
When we let Love lead the way, we find that we don’t actually need more time. We just need right now. Now is the only place that moments can be lived. In another article, “Improve Your Time,” Mrs. Eddy wrote, “All successful individuals have become such by hard work; by improving moments before they pass into hours …” (Miscellaneous Writings 1883-1896, p. 230).
What’s most important is how we act, speak, what we do right now. If our moments are God-directed, we can’t go wrong. By trusting God’s guidance, we’ll always have present possibilities for memorable moments—no matter where we are.
Jan 12, 2004 |
by Annette Bridges
Made New Year resolutions you hope to accomplish? Goals you want to meet before another year passes? Starting instead with the present moment may set you on a path to reach your aspirations.
I think I’ve spent most of my life looking to the future to provide answers, opportunities, realized dreams. But no longer. Today, I have a new approach to how I want to live my life. It’s one that begins with moments, improves moments, and considers present possibilities – right now. I no longer want to put off for tomorrow what could be done today, said today, experienced today.
Mary Baker Eddy, author of Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, has provided some instructive and helpful ideas on living in the present. There are two paragraphs taken from different articles she wrote that I have found especially helpful.
The first is from an article entitled “Improve Your Time:”
“Success in life depends upon persistent effort, upon the improvement of moments more than upon any other one thing. A great amount of time is consumed in talking nothing, doing nothing, and indecision as to what one should do. If one would be successful in the future, let him make the most of the present.” (Miscellaneous Writings 1883 – 1896)
The second is from “Now and Then:”
“This was an emphatic rule of St. Paul: “Behold, now is the accepted time.” A lost opportunity is the greatest of losses. Whittier mourned it as what “might have been.” We own no past, future, we possess only now. If the reliable now is carelessly lost in speaking or in acting, it comes not back again. Whatever needs to be done which cannot be done now, God prepares the way for doing; while that which can be done now, but is not, increases our indebtedness to God. Faith in divine Love supplies the ever-present help and now, and gives the power to “act in the living present.”” (Christian Science Sentinel May Vol.5)
So, I’m making now the focus of my life and here are a few of the ways it’s working:
- Unhappy with my current old home, unable to build a new house right now, I’ve begun improvements to make my home the best it can be. I’ve found present possibilities that showed me I don’t have to wait to build a new house to be happy where I live.
- I’m using money more productively today and finding ways to benefit others with it, too, rather than allowing thoughts of retirement, savings and children’s inheritance to dominate my life.
- Instead of constantly trying to loose pounds, now each day I’m focusing on achieving the balance and physical activity needed in my life.
- I’m taking time to read.
- I’m allowing time for reflection and meditation.
- I’m not missing opportunities to tell someone I love them.
- I’m listening attentively when a friend calls.
- And I’m taking breaks during the day to play with my puppy.
Living in the present has made me realize how many things I put off to do tomorrow which were never done. We own the now, this very moment. I don’t want to miss a moment of my life worrying about tomorrow. I think happiness is only found in the present moment and not in an uncertain future defined by possessions longed for or goals not yet reached. Making the decision to live my life in the now is already bringing contentment and peace of mind I never had before.
Originally published in January 2004. ©Annette Bridges. All rights reserved.
